Is anyone else parenting a tween at the moment?
And I won’t lie, it has totally increased the level of this parenting game (for me) tenfold.
I get it though.
It is a strange new world my daughter has to get used to which is combined with hormones hitting her with the crazy stick resulting in our farm not being calm! One minute she is my gorgeous little sweet baby and the next minute she is screaming the house down and the next minute she is sobbing into her pillow. It reminds me a little of when I was pregnant,haha. #damnyouhormones
However I am trying my hardest to hold space for her, to let her know she is always loved not matter what, to teach her how to be kind to herself and to flow with her, instead of against her.
As I share with my clients who we help start an online business with and in my Facebook group of over 14,000 like-minded mums and on my Instagram the juggle of business and being a mum of 4 is very real.
But also very doable.
Although I won’t lie. The other morning, it got me, it got me good.
It left me emotional eating a hot chip sandwich while on the phone to the pediatrician, while the twins ate a white chocolate muffin and left over chips for their morning snack outside the hamburger shop after a disaster of a morning trying to get her to school after she refused to wear her uniform.
It was the Principal that saved our day and said to me it is ok, take her home and let her have the day off. Let her watch a movie, have a hot chocolate. Reset and come back and try again tomorrow.
I instantly snapped out of my morning rush haze and thought, of course.
God don’t we all need days like that sometimes?
This advice is not only brilliant for an 11 year old to learn and activate when needed but it is essential for us mums too. And because I am the boss and have my own business I was able to take her home instead of having to rush to a job and leave her.
The reset – It is an absolutely essential skill to learn and master within business. And life.
I know it sounds a little odd but sitting at the laptop for the entire day or if you’re in a stressed out state because you think you can’t afford time to reset or do your morning routine is not actually true. 8 hours at the laptop creates a lower work output than 7 hours at the laptop and 1 hour resetting or routining.
My ego-self wants to me to believe I don’t have the time for meditation, or gratitude or exercise and it sounds simple but pulling myself away and making the time is actually really hard for a workaholic like me but over time I have crafted this skill and I do it specifically to enable me to get into ‘the flow’.
When I take the time to set myself up properly in the mornings or reset myself after a stressful situation it means I won’t waste my day working at an unproductive 3 when I can flip it into a productive 10. By starting my morning off right or by resetting it means I will work faster, clearer and more concise. I’ll make decisions faster, I am more creative and I can generally get 8 hours worth of work done in 4.
We are all busy mums and this is one of the absolute best hacks I have in terms of growing your business fast in the limited time you have.
A good morning routine or reset can set you up for a successful day. Not a morning person? There’s nothing wrong with that too. Some people are much more energised and productive at night my point is, it is about finding your flow and working from there as opposed to a stressed out or unaware state.
Let’s have a look at some of the things that help me get my mindset right in the morning or that I do to reset if my day goes downhill.
When you wake in the morning our brains instantly start thinking about everything we have to do on our to do list or worse still the kids have already woken up and are crying and screaming for attention. Before we know it, we are stressed and this then unfolds into our day. Even if I have to get up straight away to tend to a child as I am getting up I am mindful and doing a quick mental list of the things I am grateful for. But let’s be honest, yeah the kids drive me mad most days and yes Susan, I can’t be happy all the time as a mother but I can do my best to flip my day and reset it.
This one’s a hard one for many. While I’m not particularly perfect at it, I still know the value of it it. Quieting your mind in the morning can be really beneficial for your wellness. Grab a candle, a glass of water or a hot cup of green tea and lemon, some essential oils and give yourself some mind/body connection. There are plenty of guided meditations available on YouTube, or you can do a general Google. This is the perfect way to relax and have some time for yourself, even if it is just five minutes. For some people, they can really tell the difference in their work when they meditate.
Journaling or Reading
If you have time in the morning, writing things down or reading a good book of your choice can set your actions for the day. Perhaps you can jot down how you’re feeling, or a task list of things to do for the day. Start with the hardest task, or something that is difficult and then work your way down.
Reading an inspiring book can also spark positivity and a creative mindset for the day ahead. Ben Angel’s “Unstoppable” book has got me hooked now, it’s got some great examples of how you can bio hack your body and mind for success. You don’t have to read the whole thing or write an essay! Just even read a chapter with your cup of tea or coffee and then leave the rest for before bed at night.
A breath of fresh morning air can really give you and your body a restart in the mornings. Most mornings after my gratitude I am out the door for my walk, run or some type of exercise. Crisp air and sunshine can be so beneficial for your mental health and wellbeing. Also, moving your body in the morning can really start your day with energy. Even if I have the twins with me on that morning I will pop them in the pram for a power walk while I listen to a podcast or music.
Did you know when we are stressed out we tend to shallow breathe and this then sends signals to the brain that pushes our body into fight or flight mode and did you also know that when we are in this mode our IQ lowers? Yep!! So no matter what is happening or where you are whether it is first thing in the morning or if you’re driving or if you just got a stressful email from a client or a phone call from the school remember your breathing! First thing in the morning and throughout the day I regularly will do breaths of 4. In for 4, out for 4, in for 4 and out for 4.
Next whether it is first thing in the morning as I sit down to start my day or whether I need a reset I remind myself of these questions to ensure I stay on track:
- What are my income-producing tasks? I generally always work on these first.
- What are the bottlenecks in my business? Bottlenecks come up for me all the time, whether I need to approve a blog, get back to my accountant, outsource a new task, or get back to a team member with approval or advice about something.
- What’s happening with traffic coming to my business? Is it increasing in growth? I am always ensuring that I have a flow of traffic coming to my website and that my Facebook page and group are growing and looking at how to increase it.
- How can I serve and give value today? For me, it isn’t just about doing business, it is about making an impact, being a good person and sharing what I know to help others.
- Am I in the flow? Working within the ‘flow’ is my biggest productivity hack and really is the message I am wanting to communicate within this blog. For so long, I used to work from a state of overwhelm or stress, or even just a bit of absent mindfulness. But, for the last few years I unwittingly started to work from a place of feeling really connected to what I was doing, being laser focused, inspired, confident and content.
- Where is my coffee? The end.